mike zimmer bullshit

Mike Zimmer Has Opinion’s on Clocks

How does Mike Zimmer feel about clocks? Here’s another reason – aside from Mr. Zimmer Coach making this defense respectable this year – as to why Mike Zimmer is cool. I think this came after the Chicago Bears game where we all learned that, indeed, the clocks ARE bullshit. There was a malfunction or something […]

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Matt Kalil is Probably Awesome at Flip Cup

Matt Kalil has had a fairly rough season this year, even though he didn’t play awful against the Panthers. Of course, not playing awful isn’t exactly a ringing endorsement, but when you’re Matt Kalil, it just might be! Especially when you’re probably only liked because your mother is a total looker. Either way, by this […]

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Matthew Stafford’s Fiance Kelly Hall Loves Balls

The last time we talked about the Detroit Lions Matthew Stafford’s fiance, Kelly Hall, was probably a while ago. And it probably had to do with her boobs. Which is entirely a legit reason to talk about her. But today, we are talking about her because of another reason, that has nothing to do with […]


Panthers vs. Vikings: Mushroom Stamp Winner

I’m giving this week’s poop stamp to Everson Griffen, but damn was this a hard choice. For the record, here is what Everson Griffen did for the Vikings on Sunday: – 5 total tackles, 3 of them solo, 2 sacks, 2 tackles for loss, 2 quarterback hits, 1 blocked punt returned for a touchdown That’s […]

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Holiday Bonus Hot Cheryl Kalil Twitter Action!

Y’all may be fed up with Matt Kalil this season (Well, so are we … We did give him a poop stamp earlier this week), but one thing we will NEVER tire of is his hot mom, Cheryl Kalil. So, it is with great regret and a somber apology that I belatedly present to everyone […]


Happy Vikings Thanksgiving from Purple Jesus Diaries 2014!

Gonna be honest with you. This gets more and more depressing every year. In 2012, we wished you all a Happy Thanksgiving by listing a VERY large list of Vikings and Vikings related things we are thankful for. In 2013 that list was trimmed VERY short, to include only one listing, which was Adrian Peterson? […]


Packers vs. Vikings: Mushroom Stamp Winner

It feels fair that Matt Kalil deserves the poop award this week, right? Again, I didn’t bother watching this game because I’m an awful fan apparently, OR(!) the outcome was entirely predictable. Either way, as I review the box score and see that third year left tackle, top 10 NFL pick, and double chin fan […]

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PJD’s Week 12 Recap: No Blow Outs!

I didn’t actually watch this game. True story. It’s Packers vs. Vikings week, and I couldn’t really find much interest in it. What, do we beat the Packers to go to 5-6 on the season? I guess that would have piqued my interest a little bit, but probably not a ton. And it’s not like […]


Vikings vs. Bears: Mushroom Stamp Winner

I gotta give it to Josh Robinson this week, but really, it should be Norv Turner. The Vikings defense didn’t play AWFUL on Sunday. They played bad, certainly, not know the difference between getting off the field on third down and an asshole from a balloon knot. I don’t even know what that means, but […]

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PJD’s Week 11 Recap: Vikings Football Returned Unfortunately

In week 10 of the NFL season, the Minnesota Vikings had a bye week. That means, they didn’t play that week. You know what I did? I woke up early, was outside by like 10:00 AM, did a bunch of yard work, cleaning out my gutters for the impending snow storm that hit, raked a […]

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The Vikings Stadium Progress In Time Lapse

Have you been to the east side of downtown Minneapolis lately? If you haven’t I wouldn’t exactly blame you. What are you going to do down there besides kill time before a Vikings game? Visit Town Hall for an expensive in-house beer? Sure, I guess. But no one does that. The east side of downtown […]


Vikings 2014 Bye Week: A GIF Review

The Minnesota Vikings have just completed their 2014 Bye week and first, the good news … We didn’t lose! Also good news: As far as I know, no one has been arrested. Now, news may leak in six months that Jerick McKinnon beat his kid with a tree branch or something, I don’t know, but […]