Remember 2003? Those were dark times in Minnesota. We had D’Wayne Bates as a receiver, and Hunter Goodwin caught four receptions that year. What were we thinking?! That was also the year where we started out 6-0, then crapped then bed and lost to the Cardinals in the final game of the season, on the final pass of the year, as time ran out, because of a push-out, that knocked us out of the playoffs, and oh god why am I talking about 2003?
Well, apparently, 2003 was also when Reebok started dicking around with the Minnesota Vikings uniforms and proposed several new versions that never actually saw the light of day. Courtesy of Uni Watch, mock uniforms for the Vikings that were floated around 2003 have now seen the light of day, with promise of more proposed uniform designs coming in the near future. For the ones seen here, parts of these uniform suggestions were eventually integrated in the 2006 upgrade that should forever go unnamed, including the “cool” horns-as-stripes on the shoulders, and asymmetric piping down the pant leg, but holy god … They also almost had a third jersey that was entirely black and what the hell were you thinking.
Here you can see both designs that Reebok proposed. The first design (We’ll call it “Stripey”) is some weird combination of horrors. Here we see the distasteful wavy striping down the side of the leg that was eventually implemented – to some degree – in the 2003 design, but we also see piping down the front of the jersey, too, which serves no real purpose besides being distracting. It’s awful. I DO kind of like the increased stripes on the shoulders, but not in conjunction with the front piping. Of course, on top of this, is the proposed black jersey top with 3D shaded numbers. There was a dark time in uniform design in the early to mid 2000s where everyone wanted to add black to the uniforms just for the hell of it. It’s called BFBS, or, Black For Black’s Sake. That’s what this would have accomplished. It would serve no serious design purpose, and would just be added to the uniform to be “hip” and “cool.” You know what else is cool? WINNING. Idiots.
The other proposed design (We’ll call this one “Horny”) begins showing touches of the 2006 “upgrade” by adding the horns to the shoulder stripes. It still looks atrocious. Even worse is the COMPLETE lack of stripes anywhere on the jersey, from the shoulders to the pant legs. If you can’t tell yet, I like stripes, and when you go and offer a design that has NO stripes, stupid shoulder features, and an ALL BLACK leotard? I’m going to fire you on the spot. Oh, also, a jersey design that incorporates all block numbers on every design like you think you’re the crappy 49ers jersey version or something. I mean, you couldn’t even copy the best looking version? Thanks for nothing.
Thankfully, neither of these came to fruition exactly as proposed, even if different elements did seem to work their way into the 2003 version. Luckily, we ditched all of this garbage of the mid-2000s and went back to a much cleaner, classier look last year. I can finally stop complaining. Maybe.
Be on the look out for more updates, as Uni Watch promises there were even more proposed designs lurking around. We’ll grab them and share them as they appear. Prepare for more nightmares!